When your gone
by ArtisticGirl2.0
Summary: Misty misses Ash and makes a big life or death dission. Aaml always!Songfic and Deathfic! Rated t for death
1. When Your Gone

_I always needed time on my own  
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry  
And the days feel like years when I'm alone  
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side_

_When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now_

Misty looked at an old photo that was taken a very long time ago and the silver conference. It was a picture of her and Ash side by side she was tugging on his arm and laughing he was looking down on her and smiling gently. She started crying she missed Ash and not just because he was her best friend but because Ash was the man that held her heart and he will always be the one she will ever love nobody else.

She hated leaving him to run the gym it broke her heart when she had to walk away but she made the mistake of looking back there he was walking away as if he didn't care if she left she biked as fast as she could back home.

_ "Come on Mist hurry up I wanna get my next badge!" _ He could hear him say those words they played over and over again in her mind like a recording.

"Ash please come back I want to be with you travel with I so badly want you here you hold me and comfort me and tell me everything is gonna be ok!" said Misty as more tears cascaded down her red tear stained face.

**_Ring Ring_**

"Like I'll get it!" Daisy said

"Like hello Cerulean City Gym Daisy speaking!" Daisy said

"_Hey Daisy is Misty there?"_ It was Ash

"Yeah she's here but she refuses to leave her room we have a hard enough time getting her to open the door to eat!"

_ "Wow that's bad I'm in Viridian Forest I'm coming over to help as soon as I get in Cerulean!" _Ash saidand then hung up.

_When you're gone  
The pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
The face I came to know is missing too  
When you're gone  
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok  
I miss you_

_I've never felt this way before  
Everything that I do reminds me of you  
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor  
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do_

**MISTY'S POV**

I look at the hat Ash gave me I start crying again. He never ever let anyone touch that hat I take the hat off the shelf and I hold it close it stills smells like him I put it back before it gets wet with my tears. I don't want to ruin that smell. God I love that traveling smell of the forest. '_I know what I have to do I can't live like this!'_

_I've never felt this way before  
Everything that I do reminds me of you  
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor  
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do_

I walk towards my bathroom and open a hidden cupboard that's in the wall and I grab the small kitchen knife that's hidden in there.

**ASH'S POV**

I run as fast as I could to Cerulean _'If Misty's eating something isn't right what if she's starving herself to death or what if she's hiding in there so she can kill herself in peace STOP THINKING LIKE THAT KETCHUM! Misty's a though girl she's wouldn't do anything drastic like that so stop thinking like that'_

I look at the knife in my hands it's been there for five months what's the point of living Ash will never love me the way I love him so why keep on living. He hasn't called; He hasn't written he hasn't done anything to keep in contact with me so why live?

"_Ash I hope you live a very happy life without me I want you to be happy I'm doing this for you'_ I looked at the desk it had a bunch of suiside letters for everybody one wrote for every one important to me. One for Daisy, Lily and Violet they each got separate ones, one for Brock, one for Mrs. Ketchum and one for….Ash.

I put the knife to my wrist looked at a picture if I'm gonna die Ash's face is what I want to look at and I cut my wrist.

_When you walk away I count the steps that you take  
Do you see how much I need you right now_

**ASH'S POV **

When I got to the cerulean gym there were police cars and ambulance and Daisy, Lily and Violet in tears over by the ambulance they were loading somebody into a black bag the one where they put dead corpses and I ran up to the gym past people and tried to enter but officer jenny stopped me.

"I'm sorry you can't get unless your family" She said

"I'm not part of her family but I'm her best friend!" I said trying to get past her

"Sorry but…" she was cut off by Daisy

"He's okay he's telling the truth let him by" Daisy said as Officer Jenny let me Daisy brought me into the house

"Please don't tell me is she?" I asked in a panic she just nodded and cried some more Lily walked up to me and handed me three letters one had my name on it one had my mom's name on it and last one's for Brock.

_When you're gone  
the pieces of my heart are missing you  
When you're gone  
the face I came to know is missing too  
When you're gone  
the words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok  
I miss you_

"She wrote us all suicide letters each one's different we all got one go ahead open yours up" She said as she sat down on the couch I opened mine slowly and I read the letter there was a letter and a CD.

_'Dear Ash _

_ I know your gonna be upset but I know you'll move on and fast I was always the annoying tomboy red head that followed you around for her bike those four years probbly meant nothing to you Ash but it meant everything to me Ash. In those for years I was with you, Brock and of course Pikachu  
(I'm gonna miss him too) I fell in love with a raven haired, stubborn, cute and loving boy Ash and that boy was you. I fell in love with you Ash and I can't live without you Ash and I know you don't love me back so I well I killed myself. I hope you know even in death I still love you. The CD is something I made for you about how I feel and I made it myself before I died I sung all the songs and did everything myself so I hope you like it. Enjoy your life Ash I know you can make it to Pokémon Master you can do it Ash without me live your life for both of us Ash!_

_Love Your _

_ Misty Kasumi Waterflower'_

"She loved me back I can't believe it this is all my fault if I had just told her this never would have happened!" I said running my free hand through my hair

_We were made for each other  
Out here forever  
I know we were, yeah  
All I ever wanted was for you to know  
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul  
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah_

"It isn't your fault Ash" Violet said as I looked at the CD in my hands and I looked at what was on their 'She_ sure packed a lot in here' _I thought as I read the list

**First Disc**

**1 I can't help falling in love with you 2 I call it Love 3 Love me for me 4 Kiss the girl 5 I'm in heaven when you kiss me 6 When your gone 7 Innocence 8 Things i'll Never Say 9 Slipped away 10 Keep Holding On 11 Just want you to know 12 Incomplete 13 Thunder 14 Everytime15 One More Night16 A never ending dream 17 Every time we touch 18 What Hurts the Most 19 Bubbley 20 True Love 21 Harder Than you Know 22 Amazing 23 Tattoo 24 Listen to your heart25 Hanging by a moment 26 How do i breath 27 Once upon a dream  
**

**Second Disc**

**1 I'll Remember You 2 Have you Ever 3 Everybody Wants Ya4 Never had a dream come true 5 Rainy Day Man 6 Angel 7 Hurry up and save me 8 Naturally 9 A Year without Rain 10 Tangeld up in me 11 Romeo and Juliet 12 Pretty Girl 13 One Kiss 14 Can you see me Now 15 Fearless16 Love Story 17 You belong with me 18 Marys Song 19 Our Song 20 Invisible 21 Best Friends 22 Butterfly 23 He drives me crazy 24 In the Quite Night  
**

"She must have put a lot of effort into this!" I said

"She did three months ago she went to viridian and came back with that 4 weeks later guess she's been planning this for awhile well you better go give Brock and your mom their letters." Daisy said I nodded not wanting to be here anymore.

_**So you like i may make a sequel if i get enough reviews and if people like it well i hope you reveiw**_


	2. Thunder

_Today is a winding road that's taking me to places that I didn't want to go  
Whoa (whoa, whoa, whoa)  
Today in the blink of an eye I'm holding on to something and I do not know why  
I tried_

**Ash's Pov**

As I ran back to pallet town with Pikachu hanging on my shoulder for dear life it began to rain I didn't care. The one person I truly loved is gone. Nothing matters anymore she's gone. I ran into the house my mom and Brock were on the couch my mom looked up at me smiling how can she smile Misty's gone Guess they didn't know.

"Hey honey how was your visit with Misty? Brock told me you ran out of the Pokémon center and all you said was your going to see Misty how was it?" she said then she saw my eyes and she frowned

"Honey what happened?" unable to say anything I gave her and Brock Misty's suicide notes written for them and ran out of the room and slammed the door and started to cry freely the tears never stopping and not soon after I hear my mother joining my tears of sorrow and Brock trying to comfort her.

_I tried to read between the lines  
I tried to look in your eyes  
I want a simple explanation  
For what I'm feeling inside  
I gotta find a way out  
Maybe there's a way out_

I finally got up and put in the first cd that Misty gave me and started playing really loud has soon as I put it on my mom and Brock came running up the stairs but saw nothing but me curled up in a ball in the corner and Pikachu trying to comfort me. My mom went to turn the stereo just a bit.

"DON'T IT'S ALL I HAVE LEFT OF HER! DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH IT!" I yelled at her she turned around and sat me down on the bed and I cried into her shoulder she tried not to cry for my sake but I could it's hard for her.

"Why did she have to day mom? How could she leave me? She thought I didn't love her, that I didn't care about her? Why did she have to leave mom?" I said as I cried as harder than ever have until I cried myself to sleep.

_Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer  
Do you know you're unlike any other?  
You'll always be my thunder, and I said  
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors  
I don't wanna ever love another  
You'll always be my thunder  
So bring on the rain  
And bring on the thunder_

**Delia's Pov**

As ash fell asleep I tucked him into his bed. The cd still playing on his radio I went and turned it down just a little.

"This isn't like Misty I can't believe she would do this." Brock said as we went down the staires into the living room

"I know I can't imagine how hard it must be for Ash he loved her so much and to think that she died thinking he didn't love her back must be even harder for him." I said to Brock as I sat down on the couch

"Well we better tell Proffeser Oak he must know!" Brock said going to the telephone

"You tell him I don't think I can." I said he nodded and went into the next room I picked up the letter Misty wrote for me and read it again

'_Dear _

_I'm so sorry to leave like this to commit sucide so suddenly cossidering I just talked to you 2 weeks ago. You always treated me like I was your own daughter. I want you to know that you have one amazing son. And he was the best thing that ever happened to me. Before him I had no one my sisters were always teasing me and I had no friends but after I met him I felt so loved he gave me a life . Because of him I have Tracy, Brock, You, Proffeseur Oak, You and many more all over Kanto, Jhoto and the orange islands. I only want what's best for him I know he'll meet someone speacil and I want you to make sure she makes him happy. you have the most amazing son in the world please make sure he finds his someone special for me please._

_Yours _

_Misty Kasumi Waterflower' _

'_But you were his someone special Misty!' _I thought to myself.

_Today is a winding road  
Tell me where to start and tell me something I don't know  
Whoa (whoa, whoa, whoa)  
Today I'm on my own  
I can't move a muscle and I can't pick up the phone  
I don't know (I don't know, I don't know, I don't know)_

**Back with Ash: Ash's POV**

I just got up and looked around I was back in my room. I put my head in my hands and let out breath as I remembered my dream it felt so real.

_Ash's Dream_

_I looked around there was a river and I big willow tree on a hill. 'Where am i?' I thought to myself_

"_Hey Ash!" I herd a sweet voice say I know that voice anywhere I spun around and there she was still as beutifull as she ever was. She wore long white gown and had big white angel wings and she was shinning a faint blue. I ran to her and held her in my arms never letting go._

"_Why did you leave I can't do this alone please come back!" I said crying she pulled away and looked up at me and smiled that beutilfull angelic smile of hers_

"_What are you talking about Ash? I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere!" She said to me and wipped my tears away then into turned into a nightmare she started fading _

"_Misty your fading what's happinning?" I asked in a panic voice a I held onto her tighter _

"_Ash your not making any sense I'm right here' she said the she dissapered _

"_!" I screamed and fell to my knees and it turned pitch black._

"_Don't leave me here alone" I said faintly barly a whisper._

_End Ash's Dream_

_And now I'm itching for the tall grass  
And longing for the breeze  
I need to step outside  
Just to see if I can breathe  
I gotta find a way out  
Maybe theres a way out_

I walked onto the balcony and felt a cool breeze. I breathed in that fresh sea salt ocean water.

"Misty where are you please come back to me" I said and began to cry again "I can't do this alone please help me!"

_Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer  
Do you know you're unlike any other?  
You'll always be my thunder, and I said  
Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors  
I don't wanna ever love another  
You'll always be my thunder  
So bring on the rain_

**X-X-X-X-X-X**

**Well this turned out well one more chapter to go it will be called ****I'll Remember You**** it will be about Misty's funeral all this are real songs please review thanks**


	3. I'll Remember You

_It has been so long since we have talked  
I hope that things are still the same  
hoping they will never change  
cause what we had can't be replaced  
don't let our memories fade away  
keep me in your heart for always_

**Misty's Pov **

"Huh where am I ?" I asked I was wearing a long white gown. I looked up and saw big gold gates

"Your at the gates of heaven!" a sweet voice said she knows that voice she hasn't herd that voice in so long! I turned around and sure enough there she was.

"MOM!" I cried and ran into her arms she held me tightly but there was a difference she had big white wings .

"Where are my wings mom?" I asked as I stopped crying

"You need to see something your funeral." My mom said that was unexspected I turned to her

"Huh? What? How? Why?" I sttuterd she sighed

"Because it is the law of heaven that all souls who commited suicide must see their funeral to see how much people really did care about them." My mother said running her hands through my hair

"Well…I guess it would be nice to see Ash's rection. As my Mother guided me toword earth I was suddenly nerves and scared

"Don't worry they can't see you or hear you so don't worry." My mom said as if reading my mind we soon came to an old funeral home their were so many cars in the parking lot.

"_Are they all here to see me?" _I thought to myself.

_You made me believe  
that I can do almost anything  
stood right by me  
through the tears through everything_

**Ash's Pov**

I look at her pale face paler then ever now that she's….dead. I'm still processing that she's really gone for good and not ever coming back to us. She left all of us grieving over her. All misty's sister's are here obvisly so is my mom, Prof. Oak, Gary, Tracy, May, Max even Melody why is beyond me but most of all Me. Her best friend. I could here Misty's voice smooth as silk on the cd player we decited it would be best if we played it. I felt a hand on my shoulder I turned around it was Brock.

"Hey man how are you holding up?" he asked me I looked at him

"Not so good how could she leave me here? How could she just…" I stopped in mid sentence I felt something a familiar prencence was in this room I know it would be Misty if she weren't dead.

" Everything all right Ash?" Brock asked me

"No I'm never going to be alright now that she's gone Brock." I said then Misty's sister Daisy got up on the podiem that had been set up on a stage at the front of the room. Misty's body was on the right side so that people wouldn't go near it when the speeches began.

"May everyone have a seat please. We are about to begin." Daisy said everyone took a seat that presence was still here but no one knew was in the room and the music was turned off.

_I'll remember you,  
and baby that's forever true  
you're the one that I'll always miss  
never thought it would feel like this  
I'll be there for you,  
no matter what you're goin' through  
in my heart you'll always be, forever baby  
I'll remember you_

"Misty was the youngest of the sensaitional sisters of cerulean city we always treated her like a runt so I guess we should take some of the blame that this happened. When she left for her own journey we never thought she would make it that nothing would happen. She left madder than she has ever been her entire life but when she came back with two boys Ash Ketchum and Brock Slate she changed she was happy. I had never seen her so happy before. When we called her to ask to watch over the gym that was the biggest mistake of our lives. We didn't know that she would become this depressed and we defently never thought it would come to this. If your listening to this tell mom and dad I said hi and that all three of us really did love you even if we treated you like a runt." Daisy finished came up to the podiem.

"Does any one have anything else to say?" he asked

_I promise you I won't forget the times we shared, the tears we cried  
You'll always be the sun in my sky  
It may be fate that brings us back to meet again someday  
Even though we go seprate ways_

"I do." My mom stood up holding a letter in her hand I was curious now.

"Misty was like my daughter and she had so much poitenial and I loved her like my own and my Ash always had a certin spark in his eyes that he never had with anyone else and I knew that they were in love no matter how hard they tried to deny it and how hard to hid it. When Misty died she wrote me a note and I would like to read it now." My mom unfolded the letter I waited on the edge of my seat waiting to hear what Misty had wrote to my mom.

"_Dear _, _I'm so sorry to leave like this to commit sucide so suddenly cossidering I just talked to you 2 weeks ago. You always treated me like I was your own daughter. I want you to know that you have one amazing son. And he was the best thing that ever happened to me. Before him I had no one my sisters were always teasing me and I had no friends but after I met him I felt so loved he gave me a life . Because of him I have Tracy, Brock, You, Proffeseur Oak, You and many more all over Kanto, Jhoto and the orange islands. I only want what's best for him I know he'll meet someone speacil and I want you to make sure she makes him happy. you have the most amazing son in the world please make sure he finds his someone special for me please._ _Yours _ _Misty Kasumi Waterflower" _

_You made me believe  
that I can do almost anything  
You stood right by me  
through the tears through everything_

"But what Misty didn't know that she was his someone special. If she was here I don't know how she would act but Misty if your listening please know that we all really loved you and that we never wanted to see you lay so still." My mother finished I gasped .

"Does any one else have anything to say on this somber occation?" no one raised their hands it was too hard so I gathered up all my courge and…

**Misty's Pov**

I started crying into my mom's shoulder. I cried and cried and cried and then I heard his voice and I turned.

"I do." Ash said as he got up and went to the podiem.

"Ash" I whispered and went closer to listen better

"Misty had to be the most important person in my life besides my mom. I don't think I would be this far if it weren't for her. Misty and I always fought I called her a scrawny runt and she called me an idiot that's how it always was. But evemtualy I relised that I loved her and I still do. When her sisters said she had to come and take care of the gym I was heart broken inside I wanted to tell her that I love her and that I didn't want her to leave me and that I needed her, but I didn't I acted like everything was okay but it wasn't. I never told her for a bunch of reasons that were running through my mind at the time. What if she didn't like me back? What would happen to our friendship? What if she said no? What if she wants to leave me? This were just some of the questions that ran through my mind but never once had this thought accured to me that. What if she did love me back and then killed herself thinking I didn't? I have to say that never crossed my mind. But know I relize that I should never have let her go. Had I known that she would kill herself I would have never let her leave my side." Ash took in a breath and I cried more with every word he spoke.

_I'll remember yooooou,  
and baby that's forever true  
you're the one that I'll always miss  
never thought it would feel like this  
I'll be there for yooooou,  
no matter what your goin' through  
in my heart you'll always be, forever baby  
I'll remember you_

"Now I can never see her gorges cerulean blue eyes that were unique they were her. I will never see her wonderfull smile that made everthing better in my life. Now I can never run my hands through that beautiful bright ginger hair. I will never have the chance to kiss her on those lovely lips of hers."He blushed a deep red but turned back almost instantly as he continued." I will never have the chance to be with her or make her as happy as I can. And as embbarasing as it is to admit this is that I will never have the chance to marry her and here the little sound of little feet across the floor. I miss her wonderful bright eyes, her shinning smile, her obsession with water pokemon, but most of all I will miss just BEING with her." He stopped and I thought he was over so I floated towards my mother.

_If the day should come when you need someone  
(you know that i'll follow)  
I will be there  
Don't ever let there  
be a doubt in your mind  
'cause I'll remember you, you_

"Misty I know your listening and I want you to know that I would give anything ANYTHING just to see you again. Even for a second and that I will always remember you Misty you're an impossible person to forget your to amazing to be forgotten. And that I will always love you and that I will always remember you!" he said as he left the stage and ran outside it had started to rain. And I fowllowed him.

"MISTY NO!" I turned towards my mother "It's against the angel law if your alone with him and since you're a strong sprit he will see you."

"But I'm not an angel yet I have to let him know!" I said as I followed him outside into the pouring rain. I found him on a cliff itching closer to the edge I ran and I put a hand on his shoulder her turned around to face me.

"Misty?" Ash asked looking into the rain

"Step away from the edge Ash please don't follow my exsample!" I screamed the last part at him. He turned to face me and pulled me into a strong embrace.

"I don't care if it's a Dream but I never want it to end!" Ash said as pulled me closer to his body and I hugged back.

_I'll remember you,  
and baby that's forever true  
you're the one that I'll always miss  
never thought it would feel like this  
I'll be there for you,  
no matter what your goin' through  
in my heart you'll always be, forever baby  
I'll remember you_

"Ash" I said

"Misty" he whispered back to me I looked up at him we both started leaning forward and we both felt the best thing in the world as the gap between our lips closed. Then there was a bright light I looked up to but couldn't see

"Misty do you wish to be with this boy?" There was a voice I imidiatly ansered.

"Yes I do!" I said trying not to sound desprat but I was failing

"We I'll grant your wish this is very rare but we will send you back just brfore you commit suicide both you and Ash will have all of the past events but no one else will remember" Then all there was a bright light.

_Forever baby, I'll remember you_


End file.
